Believe!

Will your stocks go green if you go green?

Stocks soar, borrowing dollars is going to get cheaper!

How do you know an airline is dead? When it moves from flys everywhere to flies everywhere!!!

American airlines files for bankruptcy protection.

TipOff, RipOff !

Money, Money, Money!

Oxymoron: Privacy Audit

Facebook agrees to 20 years of privacy audits!

Why do airlines file for bankruptcy? Excess Baggage!

American Airlines files for bankruptcy!

When Facebook goes IPO will I have to pay for every "Share?"

Facebook to IPO in 2012.

IheartU

Are you?

Owners moving from home payment to home pavement!

Housing still up in the air!

Cyber Monday: I wish I could get 75% off the day itself!!!

U.S. gears up for online technology deals!

Exist?

What planet do humans come from? Blew Planet !!!

NASA launches Mars rover.

Why not?

A little Extro!

How do you prefer to shop, in line or online?

Online sales surge 20%+ on Black Friday!

Victoria's Secret Fashion Show: Less Fashion, More Show!

Coming this Tuesday to a T.V. near you!

What makes you confident?

Why did the NATO attack Pakistan? Because they wouldn't attack themselves!

NATO attacks Pakistani soldiers near the Afghan border!

Where could you find the best discounts on Black Friday? Wall Street !

Stocks have worst Thanksgiving week ever!

Day After Turkey Day Movies: Gone With The Wind !

Happy Day After Thanksgiving!

What colors do retailers fear most on Black Friday? Red

U.S. retailers expect a shopping frenzy on Black Friday.

R O Why

QUIT!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Turkey Day Movies: Inglorious Basters !

Happy Thanksgiving!

....is not as big as it is made out to be!

The most common question after carving a turkey? Breast or Thighs !

Happy Thanksgiving!

The best stuff in Turkey ist an bull !!!

Happy Thanksgiving!

What is the most popular music instrument at Thanksgiving? Drumsticks !!!

Happy Thanksgiving!

R U?

Which letter of the alphabet brings people of the world together?

'R', It changes fiends into fRiends!!!
Facebook determines there are only 4.74 degrees of separation!

Passion!

just because!

Half Fool !!!

How do you downgrade France? You make them speak English!

Ratings agencies may downgrade France's credit rating!

Pun-ish: The stuff I write about!

What do you call debt without a ceiling or roof? Convertible Debt !!!

Netflix to sell convertible debt to raise capital !!!

Cairo-practor: Someone who reduces Egypt's pain!

Egypt's cabinet resigns.

Deaf is it?

U.S. politicians grappling with the huge deficit.

Weight! Weight!

Hot Rod!

Look again!

What is a nanosecond? A low quality iPod nano !!!

Neutrinos faster than light show up in another experiment!

He was the village stud. Teasingly they called him NEIGHbor!

Denture Capitalist: Someone who invests in vampire startups!

A vampire is a sucker for necks !

Twilight: Breaking Dawn

Did you know vampires come in 3 models? 16 Giga Bites, 32 Giga Bites and 64 Giga Bites!

Twilight - Breaking Dawn in theatres...

Why does a vampire grow smarter after drinking blood? Because he is well, red!

Twilight - Breaking Dawn in theatres...

What happens to vampires at dawn? They turn into bankers!

Twilight  - Breaking Dawn in theatres.Blood sucking vampires are at it again!

What do you call a person who mistakenly tweets a compromising picture of his celebrity wife? TOPLESS!

Tori Spelling's husband mistakenly tweets her topless pictures to his followers!He really was topless....in the head that is!!!

Txtng is awsm?

THEN: Buy, Buy Home! NOW: Bye, Bye Home!

ExStinkt !!!

veGun : People who don't agree that Pizza is a vegetable!

Pizza a veggie!!?

DomiKnows best!

In Heinzsight ketchup IS a vegetable!

U.S to classify ketchup on a pizza as a vegetable!

Thumb Suckers: People who text while they drive!

Don't drive while you text!

The U.S. says it's very important that children get the right education to compete in a global market, education that teaches them that pizza is a vegetable!

U.S. congress wants to classify pizza as a vegetable and that pizza can substitute vegetables in school children menus!!!

Eat Green!

It's all about capturing eyeballs!

My Stake in the MiStake!

Residents are complaining about the stench around the camps at Wall Street, I'm guessing it is the 99 perScent !!!

Hundreds arrested as Occupy Wall Street completes 2 months.

Have you been saving for a rainy day?

What comes after a breakup? A breakdown!

Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher to divorce!

Why are people protesting on Wall Street? They want their shares !

Occupy Wall Street movement celebrates 2 months!

It takes two!

Benetton got it backwards. It is SSIK!!!

After protests from the Vatican, Benetton pulls advertisements showing political and religious leaders lip locked in a KISS.......SSIK, I'd say!

Walled Street!

Occupy Wall Street protestors in renewed action today.

Eat, Drink and be Merry!

Where are you heading?

Are you a cityzen?

Pimp-les: People who blemished facebook with porn !!!

Facebook hit by a spam attack. Walls and newsfeeds filled with porn and other graphic images.

U.S. postal service moves from stamps to food stamps!

U.S. Postal service reports billions in losses!

Do you feel the beat?

Remember the last time?

Why is Siri so depressed? She said it was something to do with a "life of battery!"

iPhone battery issues persist...

Make life memorable!

What do some Brits call their Iron Lady? MaRegret Thatcher !!!

Iron Lady, a film about Margaret Thatcher coming to a theatre near you!

Mon ami

trENDy

How do you start a Rolls Royce? With a monar-key!

Rolls Royce introduces electric car!

What do you get when you break up Europe? E, U, R, O, P, E!!!

The European Union under pressure!

Boundary conditions!

Italy's new prime minister has renamed his cabinet. It will now be called Monti Python's Flying Circus!

Mario Monti to be Italy's new prime minister.

Why will Pakistan never face a financial crisis? Because their cricketers will keep accepting cash bribes from the rest of the world!

Greece, Italy....who's next?

You owe it !

Why will Cuba never face a financial crisis? Because Castro says so! Period!

Greece, Italy....who's next?

Why will Great Britain never face a financial crisis? Because behind her poker face the Queen has been sitting on a Royal Flush!!!

Greece, Italy....who's next?

Why will France never face a financial crisis? Sacré bleu! Eet ees not fashionabull !!!

Greece, Italy....who's next?

What do you own?

Why will the Vatican City never face a financial crisis? Because that is the one place in the world where the Lord don't taketh away what the Lord giveth!

Greece, Italy....who's next?

Just the way you are!

Everlasting Love!

Why will Switzerland never face a financial crisis? Because the world banks on them!

Greece, Italy....who's next?

A fine line !

Why will Egypt never face a financial crisis? Because it will come up with a pyramid scheme!

Greece, Italy....who's next?

Play Hard!

Why will The Netherlands never face a financial crisis? Because they'll always find a way for the world to Go Dutch!

Greece, Italy....who's next?

Why will the Czech Republic never face a financial crisis? Because when they run out of cash they'll just produce a lot of Czechs!!!

Greece, Italy....who's next!

Why will Saudi Arabia never face a financial crisis? Because they never face anything! Their face is covered by a veil !!!

Greece, Italy....who's next?

Why will Iceland never face a financial crisis? Because their assets are already frozen!

Greece, Italy....who's next?

Why will Colombia never face a financial crisis? Because when the world is depressed, we all need some cocaina!

Greece, Italy....who's next?

Why will Australia never face a financial crisis? Because they are already down under!!!

Greece, Italy.....who's next?

Stock Market Anthem: You're hot then you're cold, You're yes then you're no, You're in then your're out, You're up then you're down!

Stocks playing Hot then Cold!

REddie, StEddie, Gone.....! Eddie won't drive the osCar!

Eddie Murphy will not host the 2011 Oscars!

What is Italy's problem? No dough means no peace-ah!!!

Italy too has a debt crisis!

I O U

People in business class usually carry-on Coach and people in coach class usually carry on business!!!

A transsexual woman was elected to the Polish parliment. She stands out from the rest of the politicians. Pole's apart!!!

Anna Grodzka, who was born a man and had a sex change was elected to the Polish parliment.

I wanna...

I'm going to be rich! I've finally figured out the stock market! When Lindsay Lohan goes to prison the market goes up, when she's out, it goes down!!!

Lindsay Lohan to pose for Playboy, between being in and out of prison!

Prime R.I.P. - Political death of a prime minister. Ciao Berlusconi!

Italy's prime minister Silvio Berlusconi slated to quit.

I can get no.....

John Lennon's tooth sold for about $31,200 at a recent auction. I wonder if that made a dent to the economy!

John Lennon's molar sells for 19K  pounds at a British auction.

Wall Street faces tough competition, New York opens its first casino in Queens!!!

NYC welcomes a casino!

What happened when an asteroid hit my local Starbucks? It is now called the Hard Rock Cafe!!!

Asteroid 2005 YU55 makes closest recorded aproach towards earth.

What killed the master showman? It was the Prop-of-all !

Dr. Murray found guilty in the murder of Michael Jackson.

East is East !

What is the local term for Italian bonds? Mafia!

Italian bond yields dangerously dropping!

Just returned from my fall world trip....damn that sounds painful!!!

Chinese mine......hmmmm.......I thought in communism nothing is mine!

Chinese miners rescue underway...

When talking to my banker my rate of interest in the conversation is inversely proportional to the conversation about my interest rate!

RomeIn Charge: Charges the European Union will have to bear, due to Italy's escapades!

Italy agrees to have the I.M.F. monitor its debt resolution progress.

What did a British court prove about Pakistani cricketers today? No balls !

Pakistani cricketers jailed for a fixing conspiracy and corruption. They procured the bowling of 3 no-balls for cash!!!

What does Greece have in common with a baker? Both knead dough?

Greece bailout plan still up in the air...

Travelling the world this week!!!

I believe politicians don't pay any taxes. They are all Duty Free !!!

G20: World Economic Leaders Meet in Cannes!

Global economic leaders are in a pissing contest, what else would you expect given they are meeting in the Cannes!

G20 summit in Cannes! Will we see anything other than arguments?

What stands behind a corrupt batsman? Wickeds!

Former Pakistan cricket captain, Asif Iqbal blamed with corruption!

Travelling the world this week!