Why couldn't the Queen eat her birthday cake? She had just got a new crown!

Queen Elizabeth celebrates her 85th birthday.

How did gold get high? It was the bars!

Gold reaches all time high.....$1,500 an ounce!

The Queen had waved, Prince Harry had sung, but when Camilla danced and smiled, I BARFED DUNG!

Royal Wedding Spoof goes viral.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kav0FEhtLug&feature=aso

Easter Egg!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Easter_egg_(media)
Can you crack it?
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Scramble the letters of the word funabridged and you'll get I BARFED DUNG!

Easter Egg: Net Taxes.

Given the Easter Week.
Easter Eggs: Hidden Messages/Jokes....
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Easter_egg_(media)

Can You Crack It?
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SOLUTION: Read it backwards!!!

Why is Boeing placing all its bets on the new Dreamliner? It can be controlled only by sleeping air traffic controllers!!!

More air traffic contollers caught sleeping on the job in the U.S.!

Oxymoron: Paperback

Haven't they heard, paper is out, eBooks are in?!!!

I would like to recall my taxes. I don't believe they are working the way I intended them to!!!

Happy U.S. Tax Day!

How do you nail your taxes? You file them!

U.S. Tax Day!!!

Why do tax collectors make very bad detectives? They hate deduction(s)!!!

Happy Tax Day U.S.

What is the new dress code at Cisco Systems Inc.? Flip Flops!!!

Cisco pulls the plug on its Flip cameras...They Flopped!

Why can't anyone take Facebook to court? Because computers and cellphones are not allowed in there!

Mark Zuckerberg wins case agains the Winklevoss twins...

From an astronaut's perspective: If it is so cramped and small, why is it called a Space Ship?

US and Russia working on new and improved space ships.

If man were to go into space for the first time today, what would be the first words spoken? "Can you hear me now?"

Russian Yuri Gagarin became the first human to enter space today, 50 years back.

Unlike their French counterparts why are Italian women so eager and willing to put on a veil? To avoid the roving eyes of Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi!!!

The French law abolishing the veil in public places kicks in today.

What is the difference between the People's Republic of China and Disney? One is Mao's creation, the other created the Maos!

Disney World coming to China!!!

What is the longest distance between two points? An argument!

The US budget debate seems to be over....for now at least!

Mumbai: How do you find a Hindi movie? You look up its Item Number!

Missing Mumbai!!!

Mumbai: Mumbaikars have a big foot fetish. They love Wadda Wadda Paos!!!

Missing Mumbai!

Mumbai: Local trains are where the locals train!

Missing Mumbai!!!

How do you measure solar energy? Kilo Warts!

General Electric to build America's biggest solar panel factory.

What do you do when a government shuts down? You boot it!

Could the US government shutdown if no agreement is reached on a spending plan for 2011?

Victoria's Secret prevents US Retail sales number from going bust. People are pulling money out of their IRAs and stuffing it into BRAs!

Victoria's Secret does 10 times better than expected.

What is this life if, full of care, We have no time to upload and share?

The world moves from paper to digital....

Submarine: A foot long fish sandwich!

Virgin Oceanic: Passenger trips to the bottom of the ocean!

Ultimate Luxury: Driving a Mercedes is like being on a never ending cruise!

Mercedes recalls thousands of SUVs whose cruise control won't disengage when brakes are pressed...

What do you call a luxury car that won't stop when you want it to? Mercy-des Benz!

Mercedes recalls thousands of SUVs whose cruise control won't disengage when brakes are pressed...

Why is the Boeing 737 called a low-rise plane? Because it shows some crack!

More cracks being discovered on Southwest Boeing 737s...

What bait do you use to phish for electronic IDs? A Mail Worm!

Biggest email security breach uncovered at online marketing firm Epsilon...

McDonalds to grill 50,000 buggers today!

Hiring 50,000 employees in 1 day.

Wind Ow Seat: A seat on Southwest Airlines' planes that has direct access to the overhead Wind and Ow...Ow...Ows!!!

Southwest Airlines grounds 70+ planes after mid-air creation of windows in the overhead fuselage!

After all the planning and rehersals, at the end of the day, Prince William and Kate Middleton's honeymoon will be, A Royal Screw Up!

The Prince claims to be a bit nervous!

...the rest of the world just ran out of balls!

India wins the 2011 ICC World Cup.

Southwest Airlines offers half off all its flights!!! The top half that is.....

Southwest Airlines flight cracks top in air and makes emergency landing.

10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 + 1 = ?

What is Google +1?

S-naked: A snake, just after it sheds its skin!

Escaped Bronx venomous cobra found....phew!

Smart Cover-Up! Magnets in iPad 2 positioned theraputically to make you feel good and get completely hooked.

Read More at: http://bit.ly/hHa703

Hey! We first call it BudGet and then complain that Buds of officials Get so much out of it!

Obama's '12 budget under scrutiny!!!

Old South American saying: "No Cloud, No Amazon!"

Amazon to offer cloud based streaming music options....

1 Pakistani over = 11 bawls !

Pakistan loses to India in the semi-finals of the ICC World Cup!

Gaddafi was spotted standing in line outside the Apple store in Libya last Friday. He was looking for a Smart Cover!

NATO increases pressure on Gaddafi...

What did officials request visitors to keep when a venomous cobra escaped the Bronx zoo? Poise on the situation!

Cobra escapes zoo housing....

What do you call a VW that stops when you honk? A Bug!

VW recalls thousands of cars that go dead when you press the horn!

Consumers love to view a news paper but hate to payper news view!

New York Times begins charging online users...

Our local librarian divorced Paige Turner, his wife of 15 years. He says he's now in love with Dee G. Tull !

eBooks pushing out paper!

Bookstore: The storage capacity of your eReader!

Mega bookstores going out of business, while eBooks flying off the shelf...

Oxymoron: India Pakistan Match!

ICC Semi Finals...There's clearly no match!

Blew Planet?

We blew it? Once upon a time we had a blue planet.

Elect Tree City !

Turn the lights off...Go Green - Earth Hour!

Remember to turn the lights back on at 9:30 PM!

Earth Hour!

Wit: A fine line between LOL and WTF !

OMG, LOL and FYI get added to the Oxford English Dictionary.

Where are air traffic controllers allowed to fall asleep on their job? A no-fly zone!

Air traffic controller at Washington Regan airport falls asleep on the job!

Why did credit cards, as we know them, surface only in the late 1920s? In order to create ironclad, no-escape contracts banks had to wait for Houdini to die!

Harry Houdini's birthday!

Coalition forces have apologized for bombing Gadhafi's compound, it was a human error. They read it on their maps as "Gadhafi. Come Pound!"

Buildings withing Gadhafi's compound hit by coalition missiles.

Why do women go topless for Tiger Woods? Because with him, everything starts with a Tee Off !!!

Tiger has a new girlfriend....

I lost 140 lbs on the Twitter diet. Whenever I see food I ask myself, "Tweet or not Tweet?"

Twitter turns 5...

AT&T&T

AT&T buys T-Mobile!

Egypt has biggest election! Well at least the biggest one since the election of the pylamids thousands of yeals back!

Egyptians vote to change constitution.

If the cover is so "Smart" and more important "In-Stock", do I even need to buy an iPad 2?

iPad 2 giving consumers a run for their money! Sold Out in the US and no shipments in sight!

What do you call a place where good jokes are put up for display? Amuseum!

US Airways jet that landed in the Hudson river now heading to a North Carolina museum!

How do you know Mother Nature is pissed? She mooned us last night! She mooned us Big Time!

Full moon. Biggest in 20 years!

I ENeuf!

Microsoft rolls out IE9!

Internet Explorer Nein!

Microsoft rolls out IE9

The iPod had my Angry Birds, what did the Zune have? MyCrowSoft !

Microsoft decides to pull the plug on Zune!

Auto Pilot: According to Air India is someone who goes from driving an auto rickshaw to flying a plane...overnight!

Air India caught in controversy over unqualified pilots!!!

Air India says it's no big deal that many of its pilots are not qualified to fly, after all the contraptions they fly are not qualified to be planes either!

Air India pilots flying with fake papers!!!

Use the word 'Dublin' in a sentence. "After 8 pints of Irish beer the weak start Dublin' up!"

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Outside the general area of circles, people who know the value of pi are square !

3/14 celebrated this week as pi day!
Mathematicians around the world will work 22/7 this week...

Why was cocaine found at NASA? Given the skyrocketing fuel prices, scientists needed a cheaper alternative to "go into orbit!"

Cocaine discovered at the Kennedy Space Center!

Marketing: A fine line between Soul Doubt and Sold Out!

Apple's marketing engine's cranking....iPads are Sold Out!

What did the iPad say to the computer? What happens in VGAs stays in VGAs !

iPad2 making the computer & laptop obsolete?

Early to bed and early to rise, and your social life is collecting flies !

US Daylight Savings Time.....we've lost an hour !

Fast Food: You'd rather fast than eat that food!

Subway surpasses McDonald's as the worlds biggest fast food chain....
Rumor has it, they are a foot longer!!!

How do you re-view an iPad? You walk past the window display once, turn around and walk past it again....and again...

iPad 2 out and about!

"Mel Gibson charged with battery" I wonder where they plugged in the electrodes?

Mel Gibson charged with misdemeanor with his former girlfriend....

Apple believes, there are two types of people in the world. Those who get an iPad and those who just don't get it!

iPad2 out today!

What was an intelligent and busy man like Isaac Newton doing standing for hours under a tree? He was waiting for the next apple to be released!

Tomorrow at 5PM EST comes the iPad 2...Let the wait begin...

Why did the DOW fall? It slipped over oil !

US stocks fall due to concerns around Saudi Arabia and OIL!

What do you grow on oil fields? Cash Crops!

US stocks fall due to concerns around Saudi Arabia and OIL!

Latest European tourist destination: The Euro Falls!

Euro falls on concerns over Spain

What is the Gadhafi family's favorite grocery store? Cash And Carey!

Mariah Carey and others sang for the Man and raked in tons of Cash!

GadhaFee: The surcharge you pay on oil as long as Gadhafi remains in power!

Oil prices continue to soar, fueled by middle east unrest...

Why did Monday and Wednesday have a very uncomfortable flight? Because they had a Fat Tuesday between them!

Happy Mardi Gras!!!

DoughKnots (aka Pretzels): Dough strapped airlines tying themselves in knots over penny sized snacks!!!

Continental Airlines cuts Pretzels in coach!

Why are pigs fleeing Farmville? Because Angry Birds are coming to Facebook!!!

Popular game Angry Birds coming to Facebook...

Buglari: The company formed after LVMH takes over a controlling stake in Bulgari...

Louis Vuitton Moet Hennessy takes over stake in Bulgari, the Italian luxury goods retailer!

Fuel Cap: Entrance to the Gas Chamber......of your car!

Gas prices continue to soar!

I wish my car were recalled! I can't afford the gas anymore!

Gas prices soar...

Facebook attracts a big chunk of online advertising, making Google one of the most Ad mired companies in the world!

Apple tops the list, Google comes second on Fortune's list of Most Admired Companies in the world...

You say Admired. I say Ad mired !!!

What would happen if you were not supposed to use any mobile device for a day?

US, National Day of Unplugging...

IE6 retires Microsoft...

Microsoft begins countdown to retire Internet Explorer 6

What did Queen Elizabeth II say to the people of Ireland? I rish, you poor!!!

I very very rish, you very very poor.....
The Queen plans a visit to Ireland...

What did Mike Myers' wedding cost? ONE MILLION DOLLARS! And the divorce? ONE HUNDRED BILLION DOLLARS!

Mike Myers married!

Jobs outlook brightens in the US, unfortunately despite the phenomenal sales, not at Apple Inc. They are seeing lesser Jobs.....Steve Jobs that is!

Jobs apparently uptick in the US...

Why is it so easy to implement a no fly zone over Libya? Gadhafi rarely wears pants!

No-Fly zone over Libya being debated.
Oscar for best costumes goes to M. Gadhafi...

Feature or Bug? Mazda recalls sedans equipped with the Web!....Real webs with real spiders....

Mazda recalls thousands of Mazda6 Sedans. Spiders seem to prefer the car and have infested its vents.

What does the iPad 2 cost? An arm and a LAG, especially if you're on the AT&T network!

Faster iPad 2, slower network !!!

Wait Watchers: Apple fans who wait and watch while Apple products get slimmer!

New Slimmer iPad 2...

Why does the iPad 2 have two cameras? One works on AT&T, the other on Verizon!

iPad 2: Front and back cameras.

What happens when Google loses thousands and thousands of emails? Viagra sales drop!

Software glitch causes Google to lose emails of thousands of users.

Gadhafi asked his minister, "How much do my people love me?" "About Tripoli sir, we need to talk...," replied the minister.

Gadhafi claims his people love him with all their hearts!